Bad news for the Cinebar… and the Muchacho Exhibit.

Some of you may have seen on my Instagram stories last week that there was a four-alarm fire at the building where the Cinebar resides and with it, the majority of photos from the Muchacho collection (I think I have 3 or 4 pieces in storage). Thankfully, there were no injuries. The investigation is still pending, so my friend Stacy, who co-owns the bar is unaware of what damage may lie on the other side. There will be water damage, no doubt, but beyond that is anyone’s guess. You can read more about the fire HERE and also watch a video HERE.

I drove down there last weekend to see the building and the entire block is closed to traffic and there’s a fence around the building. You can’t see much, but the entire top floor is gone:

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I feel so bad for the owners, who were already hurting because they’ve been closed since March 2020 due to COVID-19, and now this. It went from bad to worse in a matter of hours. The fundraiser they had previously going to just maintain a closed business has now been increased so they can rebuild. If you haven't already, please donate whatever you can on their GoFundMe.

In the current state of life on earth, it feels ridiculous to even mention it, but my photos from the last Muchacho exhibit were still up on the walls! Am I upset about losing my work? Absolutely. Am I pissed off? No. But dammit! I still have my fingers crossed that a few can be salvaged…maybe? There was quite a bit of artwork at the Cinebar, not just my photos. A couple of weeks before the fire they were taking submissions for a fundraiser. A lot of artwork had recently been dropped off there. It sucks on so many levels. I was hoping the bar would reopen maybe late summer or fall and we could restart the exhibit and welcome people back to drink, socialize, and help save the bar. But that’s all on the back burner for now. So now we wait for the investigation to finish, for a peek inside to assess the damage, and then REBUILD!

HELP THE CINEBAR!

The Cinebar is where my last exhibit was hosted (the photos are still there!), and they need your help! I know almost everyone is low on funds right now, but anything you can give to help these awesome people, and this rad bar stay afloat would be amazing!

Because of the shutdowns, Cinebar has not been able to open since March 16th. They have not been able to serve to-go beverages because of the guidelines of Santa Clara County, The State of California, and the type of ABC license they hold.

The folks at Cinebar have tried to manage this burden on their own and without any help from the community, but this mandatory shutdown has gone on too long for them to continue with the way things currently are. However, they are not ready to throw in the towel and give up just yet. They got mouths to feed and many more patrons to serve. They know that once they can open back up that they will be just fine, and they can't wait for that to happen!

So, until that happens, please donate what you can here: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-the-cinebar

Temporary Closure of Cinebar

Due to recent shelter-in-place orders given out by Bay Area authorities regarding COVID-19, Cinebar is currently closed!

“We tried our hardest to brave the storm. Unfortunately, it’s gonna take us down, too. Only for the time being, until we hear different and are able to reopen.”

As soon they are operational again, I will post to let you know. Or you can follow their Instagram @cinebarsj. Stay safe everyone and take care of one another! XOXO, H

THIS SATURDAY! MARCH 7, 2020 - SAN JOSE, CA

This Saturday is the opening reception for Muchacho at The Cinebar in downtown San Jose. All framed pieces are $250-$300; cash or Venmo accepted. Also, got a limited number of photo books for this Bay Area debut... $20 each. Get there early to score yours! Hope to see you there - XOXO, H

Opening Reception: Saturday, March 7, 2020 · 7:00 PM
The Cinebar · 69 E San Fernando St, San Jose, CA 95113
21+ with valid ID
on display through March 28, 2020

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MUCHACHO - ROUND 3!

The boys are making their Bay Area debut! All framed pieces are $250-$300; cash or Venmo accepted. Also, I’m working on a little something extra for this show so be sure to come down opening night!

Opening Reception: Saturday, March 7, 2020 · 7:00 PM
Cinebar · 69 E San Fernando St, San Jose, CA 95113
21+ with valid ID
on display through March 28, 2020

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Hope to see you there! XOXO, Helldni





The Muchacho Show

It’s been almost 3 months since the debut but finally… a post on the show!  I don’t think people really understand how much went into displaying 22 photos at a gallery that was an 8-hour drive from home. It took so much to put on and I am forever grateful for those who showed up, those who helped, and those who gave their honest feedback.

After talking to multiple people about the show, so many were under the assumption that I am a full-time artist or rich, and this is my hobby. Quite the opposite, I’m a starving artist; no trust fund, no benefactors, grants, GoFundMe, or any other donations. Not only do I have a full-time job, but I don’t get any benefits through this job. No vacation, sick time, etc. Any time I take off is unpaid BUT I keep this job because it allows me to take time off and/or adjust my schedule as needed.. When I got this gallery show, I knew it was going to take a lot of money so I saved everything I could. I had so much to factor in, not only the cost of printing and framing, but transporting those photos down south, gas, food, lodging… then the gallery owner told me that I was in charge of all my advertising, the food/wine for the opening reception, and oh yeah, you need to be here at least 3 days before the opening to hang the photos… OK, more time off. So, not only was I looking at the obvious stuff, but how about unpaid time off, and bills that would need to be paid during that time? Whew! And people wondered why I was so frantic the whole time!

Now that it’s all over I sit back and look at the amount of work that went into this. I did 99% of this on my own (my boyfriend helped, and my mom and best friend bought a few incidentals). Now I know what it means when someone says “labor of love”.

There will be a viewing for all my Northern California friends and family on September 21, 2019 (see previous post). If you’re on Instagram, be sure to follow The Feral Femme Collective @theferalfemmecollective for updates.

Below are the finished images from the show. Each image is for sale, unless otherwise noted. They are fully finished; framed, matted, craft paper backed/sealed and come with hanging hardware already installed. The measurements given below are the finished sizes of the piece, not the image itself. Local Bay Area pick up can be arranged, but shipping is available too. Please contact me for more details. Apologies for the glare on the images below.

Bobby Light, 201519 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Bobby Light, 2015

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Bobby Knievel, 201519 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Bobby Knievel, 2015

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Devil’s Right Hand, 201519 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Devil’s Right Hand, 2015

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Brad, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Brad, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Brad, drawing, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Brad, drawing, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Chris, 201819 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Chris, 2018

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

New in Town? 201819 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; SOLD

New in Town? 2018

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; SOLD

Champagne, sir? 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Champagne, sir? 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Jason, the Auto Butcher, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Jason, the Auto Butcher, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Jason, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Jason, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Miguel, 201723 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Miguel, 2017

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

After the game, 201723 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

After the game, 2017

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Farmer Nick, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; SOLD

Farmer Nick, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; SOLD

Nick, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Nick, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Oliver, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Oliver, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

On the coast, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

On the coast, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

TJ, 201823 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

TJ, 2018

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

TJ and Bluebird, 201819 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; SOLD

TJ and Bluebird, 2018

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; SOLD

Shower Wine, 201619 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Shower Wine, 2016

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Stretch, 201919 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Stretch, 2019

19 ¼ x 25 ½ inches; $250.00

Flex, 201923 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Flex, 2019

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Yama, 201923 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Yama, 2019

23 ¼ x 31 inches; $300.00

Models needed!

I’m looking for a few more male models in the SF Bay Area for my upcoming series of portraits for my April 2019 show. I’m looking for the following:
1) You must be 18 years of age or older at time of shoot with valid ID; no exceptions! You will need to complete and sign a model release form.
2) Comfortable with taking some clothes off; nudity is NOT required, but if you’re comfortable, let’s rock-n-roll. Some shoots will require an assistant so please let me know if you’re comfortable with that too.
3) Have a special interest, hobby, collection, talent, look, or attitude. I know, pretty vague, but examples I have so far: 70’s style bicycle & rider, gym rat, book worm, soccer player, Star Wars collector, etc. I’m looking for a punk with mohawk, cholos, strippers (yes, male strippers!), bikers, mechanics, brewers, painters/artists, etc... If you’re unsure, message me.
4) I cannot pay you money for this - sorry. I can, however trade you a print (or prints) of your choice.

Please feel free to share this with anyone who may be interested. You can message me HERE or Instagram: www.instagram.com/helldini

Let’s make some art! Thank you in advance -Helen

Sorry...

Obviously lacking in the blog department, sorry... Been busy, but unfortunately not with photography. I have been posting a lot more on Instagram though (link below), so there's that. You can follow along until I have more to post here.

Helldini

-Helen

Portraiture

A few weeks back I was looking for a ring light so I could experiment with lighting and taking portraits. I found a pretty good one from Photojojo and it happened to be on sale for $49; score! The more professional ones can be pretty pricey but I wanted a cheaper one in case I didn't like it, I wouldn't have invested much money. This thing is pretty awesome, it has 3 levels of brightness, you can change the light to work on just one side at a time, run constantly or sync up with your flash settings. Pretty good for starting out on lighting. This past weekend I was able to use it on some friends who were kind enough to let stick this obtrusive thing in their face!  

Those eyelashes!

Those eyelashes!

This little light has definitely lit a fire under my ass to keep working on portraiture. If you've been thinking about getting a ring light and are on a budget, I highly recommend this one (especially if it's still on sale).

-Helen

Night Photo

I've been back for a month but I've been busy with my day job and medical issues. My trip to the desert was so much fun, however I was disappointed with my night sky results. It was a combination of really high winds, difficulty focusing on stars, and my shutter release cable breaking... the little lock mechanism needed during bulb mode was not working and would randomly click off and on. So frustrating. I did manage to get one shot that is OK... not really, but here it is.

Not exciting at all and not what I wanted. I didn't realize just how hard it was going to be to focus at night and just how badly the wind speed would knock my camera around even on a tripod. I did use the car to try to shield me from some of the wind, but it wasn't enough with 30+ mph wind gusts. I guess it's time to invest in some tripod weight bags... and a new shutter release cable!

Until I can get back to the desert I'm going to try to work on more portraiture but with a surgery coming up I don't know how much I'll be able to do. I'll post what I can when I can.

Do any of you have any tips for night photography? Or any horror stories about photo shoots gone bad? Leave them in the comments!

-Helen

Night Photography Part Duex

I haven't posted anything in a while because I haven't worked on anything in a while... However, I'm leaving in a couple of days and heading back to the desert to work on night photography. I was there earlier this month for a quick getaway and I got to see the Milky Way with my own eyes for the first time! You guys - The. Milky. Way. It's bananas! So I'm excited to see what I can capture. I'll be there for a week so I will have plenty of time to shoot.

In preparation I've stumbled across a couple websites/apps that can assist you if you're trying to capture the Milky Way or night skies in general:

Dark Site FinderPlug in your address or coordinates and it will show you how bright or dark your area is. This is hands down the number one thing you should be checking if you're planning on getting any photos of the sky. 

The Photographer's Ephemeris: A great app I use all the time for sun/moon rise and setting times, phases of the moon and it even gives you the trajectory of the sun/moon.

Lastly, and this may seem overly obvious, but a good weather site. I use Wunderground: this site allows you to change the station location for better accuracy.

Are there any websites/apps you use for night photography that you find indispensable? Post them in the comments!

As always, I'll be posting photos of the trip on my Instagram if you wanna follow along. If I can get to a place with wifi I'll post some photos to the blog. I'm staying in the middle of nowhere, in an RV... no wifi, spotty cell service, but amazing views!

-Helen

Portraiture

Last weekend I attended a wedding with my best friend... not really relevant to you but I'll explain what this has to do with portraiture. There's a quote about photography that I both love and hate: "If your photographs aren't good enough, you're not close enough." -Robert Capa. I love it because it's true; I hate it because it forces me to get close to people. I'm a firm believer in personal space but this is something that you need to get over in photography. No, not every photo shoot will be in your face, sometimes arm's length or a few feet farther is perfect. But to capture something that is moving or beautiful (to me) is to capture the eyes. They speak volumes.

Since I have a hard time photographing people and my best friend has a handsome face (he claims he doesn't while batting his mile-long eyelashes) I've found that it's easier for me to work on portraiture with someone I already feel close to. I don't mind getting up in his face and vice versa. He doesn't mind me constantly taking his photo and working on new techniques, he rarely says no and c'mon, he has a handsome face. He has become my muse over the last few years. I get into these documenting modes where he's basically having a conversation with a camera. So, if you're like me and find it hard to connect with people to take photos, try using your best friends. Ask them to pose for you. It's seems pretty simple, like duh, but a lot of people are not that into you sticking a camera in their face all day, every day... trust me. Even my dogs walk out of the room when I pull out my camera. And I buy them food!

So after the wedding we went back to the hotel where we thought the wedding party was going to, y'know, party...  but they all went to sleep early - BOOOO! So we went back to our room and voila! A few beers and Dewar's later I have a few shots I'm OK with... I'm not that close, just across the table but baby steps people... baby steps.

I posted a few more on my Flickr for your viewing pleasure. I'll be working on more portraits over the next few months and I want to know any tips you have so leave a comment below!

-Helen

Creativity

I skimmed over an article the other day that made me think about my recent lack of creativity. The article is mostly about entrepreneurship but it did have a quote that's been stuck in my head over the last week: "When basic needs are met, it’s easier to be creative; when you know you have a safety net, you are more willing to take risks. " I found this to be true for me, as of late. I've been so busy working and doing all the adult things in life that at the end of the day I just don't have the energy to pick up my camera. Or, my mind is buzzing with all the things I need to do that I simply don't have time for things I want to do. Right now I don't have the luxury to spend an entire day dedicated to photography, even on the projects I want to complete. Even writing this post has taken me a bit of time; I've been editing and saving for a week now!

I've read articles on how to get out of a photography rut, but some of their ideas are just blah... I've thought about the 365 Photo Project, but then I forget! Earlier in the year I had no problem taking my camera out almost every day so I started to think about what my inspiration was. Then it hit me; working on the technical aspect! Most of the time my mind is very literal, so it's almost easier for me to work on a photo technique, then the creativity just naturally falls into place. So to keep myself accountable (that's what the internet is for, right?) here are the things I want to accomplish with my photography by the end of the year:

  1. Really nailing down night photography
  2. Portraiture! I need to get over my fear of getting close to my subject (i.e. people!).
  3. Lighting - specifically 1 or 2 light set ups

Do you have any tips on getting out of a creative rut? Was there something that worked really well, or maybe not at all? Leave them in the comments!

-Helen

Well, so much for shooting in the desert!

Sometimes, no matter how much you plan, mother nature wins! I planned on shooting night shots Friday night but a dust storm ruined any chance of that... then it poured all day Saturday. Monsoon season started early this year so I had anticipated *some* rain but I didn't think about haboobs (Arabic for dust storm). I don't know why... I've spent enough time in the desert to know better but usually I'm there in the spring or right when monsoon is ending. The desert is an entirely different animal in the summer. Here's some shots I did take with my phone (the last 3 I snagged from my Instagram):

The haboob rolling in! This is what it looked like from my hotel room

The haboob rolling in! This is what it looked like from my hotel room

Wonder Valley

Wonder Valley

palms
skyvillage

It's funny, in my last post I talked about breaking the rules but I didn't want to take my camera out AT ALL over those 2 days! Seriously, that dust was superfine and I wasn't about to ruin my stuff. Oh well, I guess I'll have to plan another trip soon!

-Helen